Know how to behave
Funeral Etiquette
When someone you know passes away, your first instinct is to offer encouragement, help, and support to those affected — but you may not be sure what to say or do. It’s okay to feel this way.
Like everything in society, funeral etiquette and what is expected of you has evolved over time. As always common sense and good discretion is the best guide to proper funeral etiquette. Here are a few do’s and dont’s of funeral etiquette.
DO
Express your condolences
It’s not easy to come up with the words to offer sympathy to someone who has just lost a loved one. You don’t need to be a poet, simply saying something like “I am sorry for your loss, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family” is enough.
If you can’t be at a funeral service in person, sending a card or leaving a message on a memorial website is a perfect way to express your sympathy.
Dress appropriately
Gone are the days of dressing up in all black for a funeral, but jeans and a t-shirt isn’t exactly acceptable either. You should still dress to impress and avoid any bright or flashy colors. Wearing what you would wear for a wedding or a job interview would be the most appropriate.
Give a Gift
You don’t need to go overboard with your gift, after all it is the thought that counts. Suitable gifts include; flowers, a donation to the charity of the family’s choice, or you can make a commitment of service to the family at a later date.
A commitment of service can be something as simple as cooking them dinner, or offering to clean up their house, any of the “little” things that may be neglected while a family deals with death. Make sure you provide a signed card so the family knows who gave the gift.
DON’T
Bring Your Cell-Phone
Your phone ringing will be highly inappropriate and will cause a disturbance, so turn any ringers or notifications off.
Even better, leave your phone at home or in your car, a funeral is not the time to be texting or checking your messages.
Be afraid to remember the good times
Funerals are obviously a time of grieving and mourning, but remembering the good times helps with the healing process.
Sharing a funny and appropriate story is acceptable, and in some cases exactly what the deceased would have wanted.
Overindulge
Funerals are obviously a time of grieving and mourning, but remembering the good times helps with the healing process.
Sharing a funny and appropriate story is acceptable, and in some cases exactly what the deceased would have wanted.